DRILL PRESS:
A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and flings your beer across the room, denting the freshly-painted project which you had just carefully set in the corner where nothing could get to it.
WIRE WHEEL:
Cleans paint off bolts and then throws them somewhere under the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes fingerprints and hard-earned calluses from fingers in less time than it takes you to say, "Oh, shit!"
SKILL SAW:
A portable cutting tool used to make studs too short.
PLIERS:
Used to round off bolt heads. Sometimes used in the creation of blood-blisters.
BELT SANDER:
An electric sanding tool commonly used to convert minor touch-up jobs into major refinishing jobs.
HACKSAW:
One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board principle... It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and the more you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes.
VISE-GRIPS:
Generally used after pliers to completely round off bolt heads. If nothing else is available, they can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.
OXYACETYLENE TORCH:
Used almost entirely for lighting various flammable objects in your shop on fire. Also handy for igniting the grease inside the wheel hub out of which you want to remove a bearing race.
TABLE SAW:
A large stationary power tool commonly used to launch wood projectiles for testing wall integrity.
HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK:
Used for lowering an automobile to the ground after you have installed new brake shoes, trapping the jack handle firmly under the bumper.
BAND SAW:
A large stationary power saw primarily used by most shops to cut good aluminum sheets into smaller pieces that more easily fit into the trash can after you cut on the inside of the line instead of the outside edge.
TWO-TON ENGINE HOIST:
A tool for testing the maximum tensile strength of everything you forgot to disconnect.
PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER:
Normally used to stab the vacuum seals under lids or for opening old-style paper-and-tin oil cans and splashing oil on your shirt; but can also be used, as the name implies, to strip out Phillips screw heads.
STRAIGHT SCREWDRIVER:
A tool for opening paint cans. Sometimes used to convert common slotted screws into non-removable screws and butchering your palms.
PRY BAR:
A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or bracket you needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.
HOSE CUTTER:
A tool used to make hoses too short.
HAMMER:
Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays is used as a kind of divining rod to locate the most expensive parts adjacent to the object you are trying to hit.
UTILITY KNIFE:
Used to open and slice through the contents of cardboard cartons delivered to your front door; works particularly well on contents ! Such as seats, vinyl records, liquids in plastic bottles, collector magazines, refund checks, and rubber or plastic parts. Especially useful for slicing work clothes, but only while in use.
Son of a B*tch TOOL:
Any handy tool that you grab and throw across the garage while yelling "Son of a bitch" at the top of your lungs. It is also, most often, the next tool that you will need.
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As of 12/1/2021, a major update of the forum software was accomplished
Update: 4/20/2024: The Eagles email account at GoDaddy no longer works. I have set up a gmail account as a workaround: eaglesinternational.email@gmail.com (This link seems to work for my outlook email, but may not work for other email platforms. If it does not load, copy and paste the link in your platform.)
Update: 4/27/2024: I am getting some SQL error pages as I click on different areas of our forum. Using the back arrow and hitting the link again usually loads the page. I will wait for a day or two before I have GoDaddy look into the problem.
update 4/28/2024 Worked on problem and crashed both the website and forum. Have now restored and will work on it in a day or two
Registration is open to the public (*) and free from any cost or obligation. Please allow up to 36 hours for your application to be processed. If you have problems registering, please email me at: eaglesinternational.email@gmail.com
(*) spambots will be deleted -- only legitimate public applications will be processed.
Reminder: the "quick links" menu offers you the best navigation of this forum -- you need to be registered and logged in to see that menu.
Tools Defined
- Dreamscape
- Posts: 3046
- Joined: Mon Oct 13, 2008 1:03 pm
- FMCA #: F391238
- Bus Model: 1968 Silver Eagle Model 01
- Location: Full Timing - On The Road
Tools Defined
Paul Lawry
Dreamscape
1968 Eagle 01 #7443
Silver 8V92 HT 740
Dreamscape Build Blog: https://dreamscapesilvereagle.wordpress.com/
Dreamscape
1968 Eagle 01 #7443
Silver 8V92 HT 740
Dreamscape Build Blog: https://dreamscapesilvereagle.wordpress.com/
-
- Posts: 390
- Joined: Mon Oct 13, 2008 1:49 pm
- Location: Brownsville, Texas
Re: Tools Defined
That was great Paul, my experience tells me that most of them were pretty accurate. My brother Tony had quite of few of the "son of a b*tch" tools, they were usually in the form of a hammer because when things are not going the way you want them to, one usually has a hammer in hand already...imagine that.
Daniel Lenz
Brownsville, Texas
The work of an unknown good man is like a vein of water flowing hidden underground, secretly making the ground greener.
Brownsville, Texas
The work of an unknown good man is like a vein of water flowing hidden underground, secretly making the ground greener.
- Dreamscape
- Posts: 3046
- Joined: Mon Oct 13, 2008 1:03 pm
- FMCA #: F391238
- Bus Model: 1968 Silver Eagle Model 01
- Location: Full Timing - On The Road
Re: Tools Defined
It's amazing how we are still alive! I've even created a few new vocabulary workds myself!
I guess I didn't work hard enough at it, I still have all my digits!
I guess I didn't work hard enough at it, I still have all my digits!
Paul Lawry
Dreamscape
1968 Eagle 01 #7443
Silver 8V92 HT 740
Dreamscape Build Blog: https://dreamscapesilvereagle.wordpress.com/
Dreamscape
1968 Eagle 01 #7443
Silver 8V92 HT 740
Dreamscape Build Blog: https://dreamscapesilvereagle.wordpress.com/
- rusty
- Moderator
- Posts: 1547
- Joined: Thu Oct 09, 2008 3:22 pm
- FMCA #: F341087
- Bus Model: 1972 05 completed 2003
1994 15/45 in progress - Location: Johnstown Co.
Re: Tools Defined
Have you been snooping around in my shop?
-
- Club Member
- Posts: 178
- Joined: Tue Oct 14, 2008 6:37 pm
- FMCA #: F351294
- Bus Model: 1988 Eagle 15
- Location: Riverside, CA
- Contact:
Re: Tools Defined
There's one missing though... The Radial Arm Saw -- the tool that rips the piece of aluminum from your hand, and flings it across the street into the neighbors pine tree.
It took us two weeks to find that piece of aluminum!!
LOL
Cindy
It took us two weeks to find that piece of aluminum!!
LOL
Cindy
Cindy
1988 - 15 - SunChaser
http://www.webcove.com/eagle/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
1988 - 15 - SunChaser
http://www.webcove.com/eagle/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
-
- Club Member
- Posts: 558
- Joined: Thu Oct 29, 2009 10:42 pm
Re: Tools Defined
Thats Soooo Funny Cindy !!!
Im Not Sure My Back OR Front Can Take Much More Of This OVER The Top Humor !!!
Hey I Got An Idea......
We Could All Go On Tour And Perform On Stage As The......
Travling EAGLES !!!!
We Will Be Famous
LOL !!!
JOHN
Im Not Sure My Back OR Front Can Take Much More Of This OVER The Top Humor !!!
Hey I Got An Idea......
We Could All Go On Tour And Perform On Stage As The......
Travling EAGLES !!!!
We Will Be Famous
LOL !!!
JOHN
John & Stephanie
1972 Silver Eagle 05 8V71 4 Speed Man.(TRAILWAYS)
1984 Eagle 10 45 Foot... 60 Series / B500
1972 Silver Eagle 05 8V71 4 Speed Man.(TRAILWAYS)
1984 Eagle 10 45 Foot... 60 Series / B500